GOOD NEIGHBORING (Part 3)
Good Neighboring habits are often stifled by choices we make in little things each day. As we isolate ourselves into our cocoons of safety and individuality we lessen the opportunity to meet and know people around us. The problem in the art of being a good neighbor is us.
In our last issue we talked about the need to pause and take time to OBSERVE. This is where we pay attention, take notice, and respond to others. We take time to consider what we noticed before we try to address or do something about it. Remember … before we can do anything of substance we need to pay attention to our neighbors. Get out where people are and take notice; concentrate on them.
It is part of what we call the Person of Peace strategy … we pay attention to where God is already at work in people who are in our path. Observing, we notice those who are searching, wondering, asking questions, or may be drawn to things about God.
We pay attention and look for people who lean in towards us or the things we say to see where God is already at work in their lives. It’s all based on the method Jesus taught His followers: go out and make disciples. We can read about it in Luke 10.
As good as the first step (OBSERVE) is, it is only the starting point. Step two is every bit as important as we give those we have observed ACCESS to our lives.
ACCESS is about giving people the permission and liberty needed to approach you and be a part of your life. It’s giving them freedom to be your friend. Good Neighboring only happens when we make ourselves available to the people around us. We have to give them ACCESS to our lives.
The question becomes …
What does ACCESS look like in the context of Good Neighboring?
The answer will take a lot of different shapes and forms as we search out ways to invite others into our sphere. In short, ACCESS is about extending a hand of friendship. It allows them to see us up-close. As followers of Jesus, when we give people ACCESS we open the way for them to see that the Kingdom of God has come near to them.
ACCESS lets others see the person we really are and invites them into relationship with us and our household. We make ourselves approachable, giving them the controls and letting those we invite decide how quickly the relationship will develop and how far they want it to reach.
At this point we might want to ask ourselves a question like,
“What can I do to be more approachable?”
As odd as it might sound, people won’t know they can have access to your life unless you let them know it’s available to them. In the self-centered individualism of our day this isn’t something most are accustomed to being invited into. The consumer- dominated mentality resists such interaction; we fear what others want from us rather than focus on what we can do to serve them.
ACCESS is about helping people move closer to overthrowing the lies culture has pushed and they have bought into. We give them an opportunity to take a step towards an oikos (household or extended family) without having to make the full decision all at one time. It provides a safe place to work through the questions, concerns, and other fears that keep people away from life-giving relationships.
Before we can do anything of substance we need to observe and make our lives approachable (ACCESS) to our neighbors. Go for walks, talk with people, listen to them, and notice things about the people around you. Then invite them into your life. Concentrate on them and, in time, the Holy Spirit will teach you the best path to Good Neighboring.