GOOD NEIGHBORING (Part 4)

What do my neighbors really need to know about the Gospel?


The answer really isn’t as difficult as it might first appear. Once we understand Good Neighboring we can see the path to answer a question like this one. Here is the truth of the situation, there are several steps we need to take to be the type of neighbor other people want to be around.

We have already talked about the need to pause and OBSERVE (Step 1) as we pay attention, take notice, and respond to others. We take time to consider what we noticed before we try to address or do something about it.

It is equally important we give people ACCESS (Step 2) to our lives. It’s giving them the permission and liberty needed to approach us and be a part of our life; it’s providing them the freedom to be our friend. Good Neighboring happens when we make ourselves available to the people around us.

In the culture of today, the next step is very much an art itself within the art of good neighboring. If we are going to go any further we must learn to LISTEN (Step 3) to others. We need to learn to be good listeners as we resist the temptation to mimic the art while thinking about what we are going to say next.

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Something we have noticed is that people are so wrapped up in whatever they have going that no one seems to be listening to the people around them. It is a problem because Good Neighboring needs us to pay attention to someone other than ourselves. The culture of the day feeds the dysfunction in our lives.

One of the problems for people of faith is they often prefer to talk rather than listen. There are a number of reasons for this, and topping the list is our fear or anxiety. We get nervous and talk too much. We do need to talk, and initiating interaction requires us to make ourselves vulnerable first, but the primary thing at this point is to listen.

When we listen, we pay attention with our ears to hear what they say and don’t say: it is to give consideration, to heed, and even obey if appropriate. We wait attentively to hear the sounds as we notice tone, language, and inflection in their voice. Ultimately, listening conveys an impression to the speaker that we are interested in them.

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Listening encourages those around us as it opens their spirit to us; it values them and what they want to say more than what we might want to say. Good Neighboring needs good listening. The two go together like peanut butter and jelly … both are good in their own right, but when put together become an outstanding combination. 

Before we can do anything of substance we need to OBSERVE those around us, give people of peace ACCESS to our lives, so we can then LISTEN to our neighbors. This is how we find out what our neighbors need to hear and see. Join us as we take another step in Good Neighboring to change our world.